Many of us grew up with the idea that sex was a bad thing. Rightfully so, as an adolescent or early teenager, but once the hormones start kicking in, puberty has reached it's maturity, and our minds begin to get explorative. Expecting a high school junior to refrain from their sexual urges is like expecting them to actually play outside, in this day in age, it's an ancient pastime.
Fast forward to mature adulthood, and the notion doesn't really reduce it's impact. Sure, we no longer think sex is a bad thing that we must never partake in. I mean, we are now adults, and adults are allowed to do as they please with other consenting adults, right?
No, with the influx of people who identify as asexual, those who have immense sexual disorders, sexual addictions, porn fanatics, and those who are just sexually deprived, there's no wonder why people are longing for this subject to come to the forefront of casual discussions. Oddly enough, it's still considered taboo to talk about one's sexual desires, though people can talk about their entire life's story without blinking an eye, but ask about their sex life, and you'll get a snare, and maybe even complete silence.
My movement of sexual freedom is not only about individuals, or couples enjoying sex they way they want it. It's more-so about changing the narrative. To make it acceptable to speak about one's sexual fantasies without being deemed a slut, or 'easy.' Just because a woman wants sex just as much as some highly sexual men do, does not mean she wants to have sex with any man that desires her.
Which brings me to the topics of societal expectations, double standards, and how we need to unlearn what we were once taught about sex.
I am an avid spiritualist that just so happens to study sex in all of its elements. I have found that sex is just as much spiritual, as it is physical. With the knowledge I have attained throughout my education, and practice, I believe we need to change what we were conditioned to believe. We do not need to have bad sex, and fake orgasms just to please our partner. We do not have to hold anyone else accountable for our sex life either, it's YOUR sex life, after all. Be true to yourself, do only what you feel comfortable doing.
Double standards exist because men of power controlled the narrative for such a long time. They viewed women as objects instead of human beings. When in reality, women are the creators of life. Women have the right to do whatever they want with their bodies without being judged, or ridiculed, by the very men that desire them.
Safe sex is important, but what the school didn't teach you is that condoms prevent STDs, but what's saving you from a toxic soul tie? What's saving you from the energy you exchange with the wrong individual? What's keeping you from giving someone else all your sexual energy, and thus loosing your power? Condoms can't prevent any of that.
And that's where I come in. I have developed an individualistic approach to sex therapy, education, and counseling. My practice is spiritual based, but not tied to any religion. I accept people from all walks of life, I just want people to heal, to live in their power, to take back their sex life, and have the best sex, every time they allow someone into their aura.
Satin Sanchez, MS
Holistic Sex Counselor and Educator